Shallow.

We grin.
We talk of shallow, happy things.
Manga characters,
and movies we haven't seen.
So foolish.
So carefree.
You are my friend,
but I will never confide in you.
You are far too innocent;
if I allowed you to penetrate my mind,
you would run, screaming.
Then, yesterday in the hallway
You were different.
You were so quiet,
so withdrawn.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
Your tone caused me to stop and stare.
Was it you, behind that mask of angry defiance,
or was it myself?
I tried to confront you;
you walked away.
It was later,
that you finally cried.
I watched as another girl comforted you.
All I could do,
was pat your shoulder awkwardly.
When the tears abetted,
you hugged me.
I thought for a moment, then,
that everything had changed.
Perhaps we would talk about the things that mattered,
and share our pain together.
But the moment passed,
and the next day
we sat together.
So close.
So far.
"How are you?"
"Good."
We sit,
close enough to touch,
and yet separated,
by an impenetrable wall.
We sit.
We grin.
And talk about shallow, happy things.
Without ever touching what truly matters.

I wrote this about an experience I shared with one of my friends at school. She is nice, and we have a lot of common interests, but we never delve beneath the surface. I wish I could say that it was her fault, but it's not; we're both to blame. The truth is, trust is the hardest thing to build, and it always takes me years to make true friends, no matter how wonderful all the people in my life are.